Flirting with Disaster
by SixEcho
Summary: Draco must thwart a fellow Malfoy’s infatuation with Hermione Granger before the power balance at Hogwarts gets completely screwed up. DHr
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Flirting with Disaster

**Summary**: Draco must thwart a fellow Malfoy's infatuation with Hermione Granger before his life gets completely screwed up. D/Hr

**Rating:** R

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything that has to do with HP. Except that one pair of socks with Harry's head on the bottom and little wands and stars on the sides… and that's probably more information than you needed to know. 

A/N: It's my first HP fic, so you know all those damn annoying slips that newbie authors make? I'll be the poster girl for all of them. 

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The Malfoy paused in front of the mirror. An immaculate reflection gazed back at him. 

Immaculate.

It was the only word in his commendable vocabulary that would do him justice, for it was a untainted fact. The men in his family had a quality about them… not of soft-featured beauty, nor of unpolished ruggedness. It was an air of pure, unadulterated arrogance. It filled him to an extent that few others could comprehend, and was made evident in the gentility of his lineage. He was a superb creature. 

"Move it, or we'll be making a shabby entrance into the Grand Hall. We don't have time for you to flirt with yourself in the mirror." A low voice snapped. It belonged to a certain irritated Draco Malfoy who leaned rigid against the doorway of the chamber.

"I was doing nothing of the sort, cousin," the younger boy shot back, adjusting his perfectly-positioned tie, and smiling one last smile to himself before leaving his chamber.

"Please, if I'd let you ogle at yourself for a second longer you would have started snogging your own reflection, Leo," Draco muttered in disgust at his blood relative. His long legs carried him through the empty common room, and into the dungeon's dank corridors. 

"You're not jealous?" the younger smirked, matching his cousin's stride. Almost a year apart in age, there were subtle differences between them physically. While both had inherited the lean frame, sleek features, Leo was not nearly as tall as Draco, nor did he have the same metallic luster of hair. His was a scorched gold that fell in disheveled, yet deceptively flawless manner around his features.  

"No. Mostly, I was feeling sorry for the mirror." Draco retorted, "Don't make the mistake of assuming that you are better than me, cousin. As long as I'm at Hogwarts you'll always be at a disadvantage."

Leo laughed genuinely and shook his head as they continued on in silence, through the corridors, that echoed their footsteps. Silent, but for the occasional muttered greeting of a painting, most of which earned a curt nod from the Malfoys.

"Here we are, try not to fuck things up too badly. I do have a reputation." Draco explained.

"Why it always about dramatics in our family? People should just learn to get along."

"Look, I'm really not trying to be your friend here," the Hogwarts Head Boy snapped, coming to a sudden halt outside the Great Hall.

"Well what are you trying to do then?" Leo questioned. 

"When they kicked you out of Durmstrang, my father was the one who got you into Hogwarts. He made it perfectly apparent that I would be responsible for your well-being, and that I'd be a _positive influence_ on you, to the understanding that you, like myself, will come into service of our Lord when the time comes. Now we are about to enter the Great Hall, where all eyes will be focused on me, and by extension, you. I trust that you will conduct yourself in a manner fitting of a Malfoy, ergo you will not make any lurid comments, or start any fires, or transfigure any students. At least in public that is. Are we clear?"

"I have a better idea… maybe I should just cast a full body bind on myself and save us both the trouble. You could then knock me over,_ roll _me into the Great Hall, and introduce me as the cousin who _used_ to be able to control his own bodily functions." Leo smirked, tossing his dark blond fringe out of his eyes.

"Now that's what I always liked about you," Draco said humorously, before entering the hall.

"You're a fast learner."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* 

"Okay, either someone spiked my pumpkin juice with something highly alcoholic, or I'm just going completely insane."

"What's the matter, Ron?" Harry asked his gradually paling friend sitting opposite him.

"Two Dracos just walked in." Ron said unnerved.

"What? Where?" Hermione asked, coming out of her own thoughts to look over to the doors of the Great Hall.

Sure enough, Draco strode in, pretending not to revel in the fact that all eyes were focused on him. The boy beside him, though obviously a relation, was definitely not a clone. Any tutored female eye would catch the difference. Of course, Ron was neither tutored, nor female, so she forgave him the error.

"That would be Leo Malfoy with Draco. I think they're related or something." Hermione mumbled, nibbling a piece of toast, quite unconcerned over the matter. "I can't believe you two haven't heard about how he got kicked out of Durmstrang for almost blowing up the school or something. Since he was accepted into Hogwarts, it's all anyone's been able to talk about."

"We've been busy! With assignments and exams and-"

"Quidditch." Hermione cut off Harry's defense with a knowing grin. "I hope for the Gryffindor team's sake that Malfoy's cousin doesn't play the game."

"Cousins?" Ron asked skeptically, "I didn't know Evil could reproduce."

"Yeah, it's really hard keeping track of the inbred crowd these days." Hermione agreed.

"Draco and Leo… the dragon and the lion," Harry said thoughtfully, "Maybe his cousin will be less of a git."

Ron and Hermione shot him equally disbelieving looks.

Just then they heard a loud crash. A first year Gryffindor who had wandered to far from her own housemates had fallen prey to a petty Slytherin. Pansy Parkinson to be precise. With a tactless shove, Parkinson had sent the young Gryffindor, along with her many books, sprawling onto the floor. Hoots of malicious laughter ensued from the Slytherin table. 

Hermione sighed, and motioned for an incensed Harry and Ron to stay where they were, "I'll go do damage control on this one."

She tossed her napkin onto the table and went over there, silencing most Slytherins with a menacing glare. Perk of being Head Girl. The Malfoys- both of them- were unaware of the commotion, probably too busy swapping notes on hair gel to notice anything else.

Of course, this was quite far from the truth.

Draco yawned with little finesse. He hated to admit it, but babysitting his cousin was a rather daunting tasking, probably the perfect torture to wish upon his worst enemy. Although finding himself in the situation drained the humor he would commonly find in it. Lucius had ordered him to keep an eye on the boy, and make sure he fell in line with the right crowd and such. Things weren't faring too badly. Apart from attracting the attention of most of the Slytherin females, Leo appeared to be having a discussion with Crabbe and Goyle. Far from being threatened by the boy a year beneath him, Draco returned his attention to the egg-based product congealing unpleasantly on his plate.

That was when it happened.

Draco looked up when his cousin's almost continuous stream of speech broke off suddenly. He noticed the immediate redness that appeared in the younger boys features, and the unflattering drop of his jaw and widening of his eyes. Some Malfoy's had yet to learn the art of subtlety.

"What's the matter?" Draco asked with a frown. "You look like you're about to vomit... or burst into song. I can't say really. Either way, don't do it around me."

"Don't mock me. I've just laid eyes on the most beautiful creature to have graced the undeserving earth!" Leo declared, looking over his cousin's shoulder in amazement.

"I swear, if you're looking at yourself in some mirror again-"

"I'm not! I'm talking about that girl... that woman… that _goddess_ standing over there," Leo restated with a twinge of longing in his eyes.

"Pansy Parkinson?" Draco laughed, turning to watch the girl who was at present arguing with Hogwart's most famous Mudblood. He probably gone over there and defended Pansy, but that would have required getting into a spat with Granger- a task too tiring at this early hour.

"Is that her name?" Leo asked curiously, "I guess I can forgive her parents for the name that does not do her beauty justice. She's perfect." 

Leo tended to have what some may call a romantic streak. Draco, who knew better, called it an obsessive streak. Once an impression was made, he would pursue it until he reached his goal, or he would fall into misery trying. 

"Yeah, she'd be a decent fuck if you were bored," Draco gave a noncommittal shrug, before noticing the malice in his cousin's glare. 

"How can you say that about a creature like her?! Those intelligent dark eyes... that flawless figure… those fiery red lips... she's far beyond the reach of any man here."

"On the contrary, Pansy's probably been well within the reach of _every_ man here, excluding Potter of course who wouldn't dare compromise his purity," Draco laughed silently, as he engulfed a rather dry piece of toast.

"Now that I can't believe. She seems far too proper for that. Perhaps it's those Gryffindor colors, or the way she carries herself- like she were a head girl or something, or maybe it's those wild tresses of hair framing her beautiful-"

Leo stopped mid-sentence when he saw the look of horror on Draco's face.

"Draco- is something the matter? You're not interested in her are you? I mean I'd never actually stoop so low as to steal a girl from you… no, wait, I probably would. Oh! She's just sat back down with that Potter fellow. I'm going to go introduce myself, wish me luck!"

An ominous silence followed.

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Please review… think I should continue with this one?


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you so much for the feedback!  I hadn't expected to continue this, but after receiving various threats, it seems that I have no choice  ;) Chapter 2 

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"Uh… why is the kid talking to the Mudblood? And why aren't you stopping him?" 

Draco's jaw clenched involuntarily at Crabbe's blunt question, but kept his gaze fixed on the polite smile that played across Hermione's face as she spoke…. No, _chatted_, to his cousin. The remainder of her precious trio had followed suit.

"As disturbing as this scene is, the outcome will work to my favor," Draco said, tearing his gaze away from the laughing Gryffindors and staring hard at Crabbe and Goyle.

"Leo doesn't know Granger's a Mudblood. Once he finds out, he's going to be so disgusted with himself that he'll be completely willing to do whatever I tell him to do so that I won't tell his father of the incident."

"Ah, I get it…" Goyle grinned maliciously, "It's like exorcism!"

"You mean extortion."

"Uh, right."

Draco did a refined version of an eye roll, and deliberately made an effort not to look at the unfolding scene at the Gryffindor table. He could not imagine what they were talking about… what thoughts were running through Granger's mind. Not that it made any particular difference to him, but the inquisitive side of him found it all oddly fascinating… if she had been a pureblood, as Leo thought she was, then things would have probably been different. Of course, he did not waste his time to dwell on the matter. He had a responsibility to keep that idiot cousin of his in line. For Leo, the pieces would start to fall apart soon enough. All Draco had to do was wait. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Don't look, but Malfoy's coming this way." Ron hissed.

"Draco?" Hermione asked, not missing a beat.

"No, the other one," Harry corrected. 

"Maybe we should leave?" Ron said uncomfortably, in no mood for a confrontation, "He looks like he wants to speak to us or something."

"Well what do you propose? Running out the hall at a breakneck pace?" Hermione asked with half a smile, though she too could not imagine why the Slytherin was closing in on them. Probably Draco's doing.

"No, I was thinking more of walking out the hall at a brisk pace," Ron declared, "Who knows what Malfoy- Draco I mean- has told that little puppet of his to do."

"Why, nothing really… and for the record, my name's Leo, and I'm nobody's puppet," the young Slytherin grinned, hopping in the seat beside the surprised redhead. 

"And who might you be?" Leo asked, stealing a piece of bacon off the other boy's plate and popping it into his mouth.

"Ron…ald. Ronald Weasley," the other boy replied, recovering quickly.

"Weasley? Why, I've heard of you… you're that remarkable Keeper on your house's Quidditch team." Leo said with interest.

Ron visibly puffed.

'Smooth' Hermione thought of Leo, 'Like his cousin, only not as bitchy.' 

She turned to the Slytherin table. To Draco. Working alongside him as Headgirl had not been a walk in the park… more like a walk in the Forbidden Forest, only blindfolded, and carrying a broken wand. He never listened to her, or trusted her in the least, things they needed in order to have some teamwork. She'd learn to deal with it of course. Gradually the catty, immature remarks of his had subsided, and were replaced by well-timed glares that left her chilled. She didn't know which had been worse. At the moment, avoidance was key to their non-existent relationship.

"Did you want anything?" Hermione asked, quite innocently, as she baited him into revealing his true purpose.

"Well as a new student, he's obviously here to meet the Head Girl," Ron said to his friend like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Hermione Granger," she stated with a proper tone, holding out her hand to the second-rate Malfoy.

"Hermione… beautiful name," Leo smiled, shaking her hand politely, delaying the touch fractionally longer than was necessary. 

Leo thought for a moment as Draco's previous reaction suddenly made sense to him. He had originally thought he was after some girl named Pansy… not _the _Hermione Granger. Head Girl. Genius. Mudblood… of course, that wasn't important to Leo. Unlike Draco, he'd never concerned himself with the pro-pureblood teaching of his family. He always got what he wanted regardless. 

"You don't seem much like Draco…" Harry said with a friendly smile, "I'm glad we got to meet you."

"Likewise, Harry. I hear you're the only rival seeker to Draco," Leo grinned. 

"Ha! That little ferret couldn't find a snitch if it bit him in the rear, then held up a fluorescent sign saying '**catch me**,'" Ron spat, then turned to Leo, slightly embarrassed at his outburst "No offence intended."

"None taken." He offered with a politeness that annoyed Hermione.

"So are you a seeker too?" Ron asked.

"Goodness, no. I don't play Quidditch. I find the game to harsh… bad for the cuticles." Leo stated firmly, noticing Hermione perk up at his comment. He took her in a glance, the swirling hair; the piecing eyes… the stack of books that lay on the seat beside her.

"Personally, I prefer reading a good book more than anything else…" Leo lied so smoothly, only another Malfoy could have detected his insincerity. "I find learning new things such a rewarding experience. I'm embarrassed to say so, but I spend most of my time in the library."

The Gryffindor Head Girl refrained from laughing out aloud. Surely the Malfoys- she was certain both were involved- didn't expect her to fall this… whatever _this _was. She put the thought aside for the moment. Like every other girl at her table, she was mentally comparing the cousins. If Draco were silver, Leo would be gold. In coloring at least. The younger looked like he'd been dipped in refined honey, and was just as sickly sweet in speech. Leo was flattering her friends mercilessly, and subtly reaching out to her with casual glances at the same time. She didn't like the game, and refused to play it. 

Harry and Ron, immediately launched into an analysis of how similar the intruder was to Hermione. Library… studying… the fact that neither played Quidditch. 

The conversation was grating on her nerves, and she didn't know why. Distracted, she turned towards Draco, probably the root cause of the situation, and was not surprised to find him staring in her… _their_… direction. Irritated, she locked eyes with him. His cool gray slits narrowed further, almost in warning. Hermione tilted her head, motioning towards the door. A look of forced understanding passed between them, and Draco replied with a curt nod. He got up and left the hall, with the awareness that she would soon follow.

"Well look at the time! I really should go do some studying," Hermione interrupted whatever they'd been talking about. The cookie-cutter excuse had served her well.

"Oh, you're leaving so soon? But I hardly had a chance to talk to get to know you…" Leo said, with a playful pout.

"Sorry, I've got a busy day," Hermione said with little remorse, gathering her books into her arms and getting to her feet.

"Would you like us to walk you back?" Ron asked.

"The road may be difficult, but I think I can manage to find my way alone," she said in mock seriousness.

Leo released a sigh as she left.

"Is there something you want to tell us, Leo?" Harry smirked, glancing at Ron who was equally amused.

"I'm in love. She's perfect… beautiful, witty, intelligent, charming… but intimidating at the same time. Usually, I would have asked the girl out by now, and have her completely besotted with me, but Hermione isn't like that, is she? I can tell, and I've only known her for seventeen minutes. I can't help how I feel though. I know what my cousin thinks of Muggleborns, but I couldn't care less. I'm really not like him. I hope she doesn't think I am… all I want to do is to get to know her…"

There was a strange silence.

"She's not taken is she? Are either of you going out with her?" Leo asked as a look of practiced horror passed over his features. He knew, of course, that neither boy would present much of a challenge, but it was just easier to get the girl if her friends liked him… and he _would_ get her, there was no question of that. With his own golden looks, there was no male at Hogwarts who could compare with him… apart from Draco, but there was certainly no competition there, at least where Hermione Granger's affections were concerned.

 "No, not at all," Ron brushed away the insinuation. "I'm madly in love with his Harry's ex, this gorgeous Ravenclaw Seeker."

"And I'm madly in love  Ron sister, this beautiful red-head with a stunning-"

"Harry! Don't even think of finishing that sentence, or you'll scar me for life, and I'll end up in the mentally ill section of Azkaban, rocking back and forth in a dark corner, singing to myself," Ron groaned, covering his ears. 

"What we're getting at, is that if you like Hermione, you should go for it," Harry stated to Leo. "With all that you have in common, I doubt that Hermione will mind that you're a year younger. I can tell you like her."

"No… what gave it away?" Leo joked.

"I'm going to have to agree with Harry," Ron gave in, "Coming from someone who was once desperately in love with, I recognize a kindred spirit. I'd actually considered starting a 'Dumped by Hermione' support group at one time. She's not an easy girl to get over. Anyway, after that hopelessly-in-love speech you just gave, how can I not believe you? You don't seem like a typical Malfoy. From what I can tell you're a decent person, who's not involved in some treacherous scheme with Draco… right?"

"Right."

 "Of course, you realize that we'll be watching you _very _closely, and if you hurt her, we _will_ kill you," Ron added, "And this won't be a mercy killing either… it'll involve various forms of torture, and sharp objects, and spiders and a recording of Pansy Parkinson's drone of a voice being played over and over again."

"I would expect nothing less from friends as loyal as yourselves," Leo said seriously.

"Then it's settled! You know what? I bet Ron and I could help you out in winning her over!" Harry said, a little excited.

Leo merely grinned.

"Perfect."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Please Review J

Yeah, I know we all hate Mary Sues… or at least the male versions of them, but it'll just make the D/Hr moments more tension-filled, promise ;)


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Aw, thanks for reviewing. I hope you like this chapter; I had a ridiculous amount of fun writing it.

Chapter 3

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Hermione pushed open the wrought iron door with a satisfied grunt. She was immediately hit by a cool gust of wind, and took a moment to savor the minty taste it left in her mouth before she entered the archaic courtyard. It was mostly empty aside from the familiar marble table at its center; various documents were strewn across it, as well as a Slytherin robe, but that was not what drew Hermione's attention first. Things were not as she'd left them last night- everything was now covered in a thick, blanket of... snow? In a courtyard that was charmed to stay the exact same temperature year round, she knew something was wrong.

"Took your time, Granger. You'd think you'd know your way here by now?"

Hermione spun around to see Draco perched high on an overhanging statue, one of four that graced every corner of the courtyard. His feet hung over the sides of the marble unicorn, cracked and worn, it had seen better days. The unicorn that is... not Malfoy. No, if anything the Slytherin was a thriving picture. His gray jersey and spotless white shirt made him look part of the marble statue itself. Hermione took a moment to consider how the Head Boy had gotten up there in the first place... then dismissed the thought. Spindly legs. Enough said.

"I would have gotten here sooner, but that little git of a cousin of yours was invading the Gryffindor table, but we'll get to that. Why exactly is this place covered in snow? This is your fault isn't it? How on earth are we supposed to work in the courtyard under these conditions?"

Hermione tilted her head to the side, squinting against the brightness of the sky that outlined the Slytherin's form. He seemed to have found quite a comfortable spot in the courtyard. As leaders of their school they'd used the area as somewhat of an office space. It had an absolute stillness that made it the perfect place to work, far more solitary than the library... and Hermione had resented sharing it, especially with the present company. Of course, they were hardly ever in there together, they'd unconsciously formed a rotation system for its use, studying at different times, and leaving impersonal notes for each other regarding prefect meetings and such. Perfect avoidance.

Only, avoidance in this case only served to annoy her.

 "Malfoy! This interrogation is not going to end until you tell me what I need to know."  

She planted two fists on her hips and gave him a reproving glare.

"Interrogation? You're not the Spanish Inquisition, Granger," Draco said lazily, leaning back against the hard brick wall. 

"I didn't think someone as closed-minded as you would know about that." 

"It's that bloody Muggle Studies class. I admit that it's rather interesting to observe how such a primitive culture survived without killing themselves. Though they did a lot of that too… I just don't see how it's at all relevant," he shrugged.

"That's fascinating, but you still haven't answered me. What's with the snow? What did you do?"

"Contrary to your belief, I'm not responsible for everything that's goes wrong at Hogwarts, and I was certainly not responsible for this mess," Draco waved to the stark white snow covering just about everything. From his high altitude, he could tell that there was no real damage. He continued.

"Thirds years broke in last night and decided that this was the perfect place to test their elemental spells. Got it completely wrong of course, but it's nothing I haven't seen before," He stated, folding his arms across the head of the statue and leaning over it."

"And you never bothered to tell me?"

"No. I was otherwise engaged, Granger."

"Ha! What could have prevented you of doing the common courtesy of telling me that our courtyard had been frozen over? Besides you your own evil nature that is?"

"I told you, I was busy."

"Busy doing…?"

"Pansy."

"Eww!"

Draco smirked. In truth, he'd been showing Leo around Hogwarts last night after the little 'break in', but the she didn't need to know that. For some reason he did not wish to bring his cousin into the conversation... _argument_...yet. While in wait of her, he'd gained a little perspective on the situation, and realized the best approach was to remain aloof and determine her position first... it was like the beautiful act of war. He'd show the Mudblood her place soon enough. She'd realize that she did not, and would never, belong on the arm of a Malfoy.

"Look- I don't really want to know about your… escapades. Tell me more about last night- what house were the vandals from?" Hermione continued. 

"Gryffindor. The adventurous little morons cast a pretty bad spell, but it should wear off in a day or two."

Hermione unconsciously raised a defiant chin at the fact that it had been members of her own house who had caused the mischief.

 "Well, then I guess I'll be when I sorting this out," She said firmly, looking up at him.

 "Don't bother, I already took care of it." He grinned wickedly at the memory of the terrified Gryffindors.  "I didn't waste any energy telling McGonagall... just delivered a huge blow to Gryffindor's house points for vandalism."

Hermione nodded. It was the least they deserved... nobody messed with Hermione Granger's study/work arena. Except of course Draco Malfoy, but he was the exception to every rule. She stared back at him.

They did a lot of staring, in Draco's opinion. Well, it was more like glaring, or grimacing, so much so that in the little time they'd tolerated each other's company,  he'd come to know her features well. Her defiant eyes, angry flush... if she smiled more and talked less, her company be easier to endure. Of course, this was not the case since he almost always felt mentally exhausted after their encounters, not that this was the time to dwell on such things. He quickly shook himself out of those thoughts remembered the issue at hand. He looked down condescendingly at his counterpart from the statue. 

"Now why did you call this meeting in the first place, **Mudblood**?" 

"What, telepathy wasn't part of the **pureblood** package," She smiled insincerely.

Draco scowled at her in a manner that would crumble most. Hermione was used to it. 

"Enough of this. If you have any sense at all you'll stay away from Leo, understand Granger? I don't want you going anywhere near him." 

"What on earth are you talking about Malfoy, I never -ugh- would you please come down from there, I can't speak to you like this," she ordered. "It's killing my neck to keep looking up at you like this."

"It's good practice. You're always going to look up to me in some form, whether you like it or not."

"Yeah, but at least when you're on the ground I have the option of kicking you in the ankle." 

Draco sneered, "I would have you on the ground helpless before you could get close."

"Oooh, how manly of you to threaten a girl who weighs half as much as you do."

"Are you calling me fat?"

"Malfoy! I'm not here to spar endlessly with you until we both grow old and crusty, so would you _please _come down here, and sit with me at the table so we can discuss this matter. I have too much to do, and no time to waste talking to you."

Draco shrugged nonchalantly, and made a movement to jump down. She was partially right. The sooner they dealt with this mess, the sooner they could part ways.

"Wait!" Hermione yelled, "Isn't there a way to get down off that statue without jumping?"

"Why yes there is, but I left the inflatable broom in the other robe. Really, Granger, I think hanging around with Potweas has made you dumber."

"Potweas?"

"Yeah, it's a fusion of the names Potter and Weasley… it's become really taxing to come up with new insults for them every day."

"But... Potweas?"

"Would you prefer Weasotter? I'm pretty flexible on this."

"Malfoy don't be a git, and back to the point, it's really too high to jump of the statue." 

"I don't need you to concern yourself with my welfare," Draco replied.

"I wouldn't. I just don't want to be the one to run to Filch and tell him that he needs to scrape what's left of you off the ground," Hermione spat at the insinuation. 

"Then I free you from the responsibility. If I fall and die, I give you permission to just leave me here."

"Whatever. Go ahead and jump. Just let me get out of the way first. This robe is new. I don't want to have your blood splattered all over it," she stated, taking a few large steps back.

"It's beautiful blood. You might learn something from it."

"Yes_, well I also might _catch_ something from it."_

Draco shook his head, then swiftly leaped to the snow covered ground in a cat-like motion. He landed effortlessly with a soft crunch of snow, failing to catch the glimmer of surprise that passed over Hermione's features as he rose to his feet and dusted off his gray jersey.

"So are we going to do this, or are you going to stand there and fantasize about me all day?" He asked dryly.

"Oh... pfft en uh," Hermione spluttered, unable to think of a response scathing enough to wipe that arrogant smirk off his face.

"That's what I thought," Draco said, dropping into the cold seat at the lightly snow covered table.

So far things were not working out well. He'd deduced long ago that Leo was aware of Hermione's Mudblood status... but for some strange reason his cousin didn't seem to care. Draco was at a loss to figure out what Leo saw in the Head Girl. She was obstinate, condescending, and prudish. Not the elements of a woman that any Malfoy would desire. Maybe Leo's attraction to Granger was purely physical... that would make the most sense. It's not like he'd found out her favorite color before launching after her. At the thought of Leo actually succeeding, a strange feeling began to simmer within Draco. It was probably indigestion from the terrible breakfast, but he couldn't be certain.

Hermione cleared her throat, deciding to take the high road on this one, and quickly sat in the chair opposite her despised foe. 

Silence.

"This is the part where you start bitching at me Granger. Then we get into a fight, I verbally crush you, then you leave in an angry fit." Draco prompted.

"I plan on a little more civility this time, and I hope you'll do the same. You and your cousin are up to something. I want to know what it is, and why you asked me to stay away from him when he was clearly the one who approached us in the first place." Hermione asked, folding her hands together and placing them on the table. 

"Is that all?" Draco asked, raising a platinum eyebrow.

"No. I want a real explanation. I mean your cousin was so… _friendly_." She said the word with loathing,  "He was flattering Ron and Harry who were completely falling for his little act. Merlin- I thought Ron was going to promise to name his firstborn after Leo, the way they were carrying on. The balance at Hogwarts has been tipped. We can't even call Leo –or you for that matter- 'Malfoy', since there are two of you now."

"Are you done?" Draco asked, partly amused, partly riled.

"Yes."

"Good. I realize that as a Gryffindor you are naturally attracted to a conspiracy, but, unfortunately you won't find one here. The regrettable truth is that Leo wants you."

"Wants me?"

"Correct."

"As in he 'wants me' to help him adjust to Hogwarts life?"

"No... as in he 'wants you' to help him adjust his tie after he's nailed you several times."

"Oh." Hermione said with understanding, a strong color rising to her cheeks, "He, uh, _wants me_."

"Like candy. His love for you burns like a fiery flame, consuming all in it's path. His words, not mine."

"That's ridiculous. Really." 

"Exactly what I said, Granger."

"Why on earth would I want a Malfoy?!"

"And why on earth would a Malfoy want a Mudblood?"

"No wonder he was giving me the look before…" Hermione shuddered.

"The look?" Draco asked curiously.

"Yeah, you know... that_ look that males have. They open one eye really wide so it slightly bulges and squint the other, then paste on this toothy grin- apparently its supposed to be attractive way for a guy to pick up a girl._

"Apparentlyit sounds like this guy is expecting to _pay_ the girl at the end of the night."

"Well of course that's the first place your mind would run off to. Then again, it's not that surprising considering who your friends are."

"What's that supposed to mean? Do you think Potweas would still be your friend if you didn't look half decent in a skirt? I'm still surprised they'd bother with a Mudblood."

"Way to change the subject Malfoy."

"You changed it first Mudblood."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't."

"Yes you did"

"No I didn't."

"I could go all night with this Granger!"

"So could I Malfoy! Ugh! You know, I don't really want to argue with you, but you make it so difficult. I know you're not ignorant enough to truly believe that my biological makeup makes me beneath you, it's something else that makes you hate me so much…"

There was a frigid silence that filled the courtyard, before Hermione ventured to break it.

"Can't we have a real discussion for once... can't you tell me what makes you want to cut me down whenever you see me?"

The Slytherin wrestled with what to say, and released a frustrated sigh. She'd tired him out again with her verbal assault. He glanced up into her genuine brown eyes, shining with intensity. She wasn't going to settle for anything less than the truth.

"Granger… I'm going to try out this honesty shit, just this once, and tell you exactly why I hate you."  His voice softened slightly, very slightly.

"I'm listening," She urged, leaning over the stone table.

"It's your hair." He said earnestly.

"What?!"

"Your hair Granger. It's big, and wild, and flies all over the place when you get mad. To be perfectly honest, it scares me little."

"Argh! Why do I even bother?" Hermione growled, leaping to her feet.

"See, this is why I don't open up to people. I bear my soul to you, and get nothing in return." Draco said, years of emotion-resistance training kicked in allowing him to keep a straight face.

"You're an inconsiderate, arrogant little inbred, who does not deserve my time or my patience Malfoy!"

"Granger, don't make such a fuss-"

"Don't speak to me- and keep that git of a cousin the hell away from me! We're done here!" Hermione snapped, before storming towards the door, much angrier than she'd been before walking in. 

"As long as you promise to stay away from him too, I see no problem," Draco called after her, but doubted that she'd heard. So much for mutual civility… then again, that had never been a part of their violent chemistry. At least he'd gotten what he'd came for… proof that Hermione did not return his cousin's affections. It was beyond him why the Mudblood would refuse a prize catch of a Malfoy, but he did not question it. He was merely grateful that he would be avoiding an uncomfortable conversation with Lucius, seeing as how Leo had no opening with Granger. They didn't even have any classes together... classes... Class! Arithmancy! He was late again.

Draco snatched his robe and shot out of the winter courtyard, back into his reality.

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Please Review! 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

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Hermione had managed, yet again, to ruin his day. Even though it was indirectly, the Mudblood's apparent charm had lured his cousin like a curse, and everyone was feeling the effects. He wasn't sure exactly what had happened, being preoccupied with other responsibilities, but Draco was there to clean up whatever mess that had been caused. He glanced into the empty Potions class. The sixth years had cleared out nearly an hour ago, but Leo's dejected form sat alone, hunched a chair. 

"There you are… you missed lunch." Draco started as he entered the room, trailed by two other bored Slytherins.

"I wasn't hungry," Leo muttered, nodding a greeting to Pansy and Goyle, who wore equally vacant expressions.

"Look, if I were you I'd also be worried about my waistline, but starving yourself isn't the answer," Draco said, shaking his head.

"Ha! I'll have you know that I have a fantastic physique; I'm practically a living version of the female fantasy," Leo argued, holding his head up high.

"And humble too, it's a nice combination."

"Yet not right for Hermione Granger," Leo said defeated, tossing an annoyed glance at Pansy and Goyle who were witnessing the discussion with new interest.

"Ah, and that would be my reason for this little visit. I assume she's the cause of your troubles… what happened? Was she not all that you expected of her?" Draco asked, raising an eyebrow.

"On the contrary, she was the one that rejected me," Leo admitted. 

Draco frowned, "What are you talking about? It's been three days, you mean to tell me you still haven't caught her yet?"

"She's not trout Draco."

"Of course she is, and apparently you've just been using the wrong bait. You really have no idea about these things do you? No wonder you've been running around, acting like it's that time of the month."

"This isn't funny. I've done everything… she could just never love someone like me."

"Of course not. She made that clear to me the other day, that she had no interest in you… but she's just like every other female. These obstacles can be overcome and turned in your favor so easily, especially when it comes to sex- did they teach you nothing at Durmstrang?"

"It doesn't work that way Draco. Hermione doesn't fall for cheap tricks, and believe me, over the past couple of days I've tried them all. Imported candy, flowers, special edition spell books, toothpaste, jewelry-"

"Toothpaste?"

"I was running out of ideas… and she has really nice teeth don't you think?"

"I try not to these days. You mean to tell me she never accepted any of it?"

"Nothing. I told you, she doesn't want me."

"Don't be ridiculous. What woman wouldn't want a Malfoy? She should be thrilled!" 

Draco was more than a little surprised that Hermione had turned down his shiny, blonde female-magnet of a cousin so efficiently. Perhaps she'd taken his warning in the courtyard to heart… in which case Leo's misery would be his fault. The boy was still the second best catch in Slytherin, but would with him the wrath of the Malfoy family if word ever got out that he was with a Mudblood. Perhaps Granger was wise in her decision.

"Nobody will ever love me," Leo sighed, "I'm going to die alone, never having made a commitment, experiencing nothing but meaningless sex with a hundred different women…"

"Yeah, it's not easy living the male fantasy." Draco said dryly, but knowing he couldn't leave his cousin in this state. Perhaps a brief affair between the two wouldn't cause too much controversy. It was certainly a better option considering the alternative of having to constantly console his cousin. Draco Malfoy was no nursemaid.

"You don't understand Draco… you've never been in love. Besides, I can't face her yet. She looked so beautiful when she threatened to hex me if I didn't leave her alone…"

"Leo, you're an idiot."

"Oh Draco, you always know exactly what to say," Leo drawled.

"I wasn't finished. You're an idiot, but you're family. I don't want you to end up like me. "

"You mean a cynical, heartless old bitch?" Leo offered, then ducked out of the way as Draco hurled a book at him with deadly accuracy.

"Ahhhh!"

Goyle started laughing; Pansy looked up with a gasp, "You got the poor boy in the eye!"

"Your ability to state the obvious is quite uncanny Petunia," Leo muttered.

"It's Pansy!" she shrieked.

"Whatever. I'm in pain here. I may have lost an eye."

"Oh, don't complain. You've got another one that works just fine." Draco commented.

"Actually this is good," Leo stated, blinking back into focus, knowing there was no real damage done. "Maybe Hermione will pity the one-eyed version of me so much she'll give me a mercy date."

"Why did I get stuck dealing with this shit?" Draco asked with a sigh.

"Yet again, your glowing sensitivity astounds me." Leo smirked.

"You know, if the kid needs a little… _cheering up_… I could always give it a try," Pansy cut in, smiling pleasantly. 

"No," Draco and Leo said simultaneously, both shuddering slightly for their own reasons.

"Fine," she shrugged a shoulder and returned to studying her polished nails.

"So the Mudblood didn't fancy you at all then?" Goyle chuckled, oblivious to the malicious glare he received.

"No, it had nothing to do with that," Leo growled. 

"Ah, so then it was the age thing?" Draco smirked, a little curious as to Hermione's true reason, "I'm not sure if a year difference would pass her as a pedophile."

"What's a pedophile?" Goyle asked.

Pansy rolled her eyes, "A peda-file is one of those things Muggles use to trim their toenails. Honestly Goyle, sometimes you're so stupid it hurts."

"Pansy, Goyle, we're trying to have a serious discussion. Get lost." Draco ordered bluntly.

"Whatever, I didn't want to come in the first place," Pansy said with a pout, "Come on Goyle, I'm bored, which means you're about to get laid."

"Laid on what?" Goyle asked as they both retreated out the door.

"You have terrible taste in friends," Leo muttered, "At least Harry and Ron are interesting, they even tried to get me a date with Hermione." Leo said with a pitiful sigh.

"Ah, and we all know how well that worked out for you. So glad to see you're on a first name basis Granger's lap dogs." 

"They're really not all that bad, Draco. They tried to get Hermione to like me."

"I'm sure they did. Those two probably know as much about seduction as Hagrid knows about showers."

"Well I was desperate! It's not like you could have helped me."

"Please, with my guidance she would have fallen for you faster than the encounter Goyle is about to have with Pansy."

"And I had tried so hard to repress those thoughts. Like I was saying… you're the last person Hermione would trust, what makes you think you can get to her?" Leo replied with a laugh.

"I may hate her, but I understand her." Draco replied, with a devilish grin. 

"Perhaps, but I really don't think you could-"

"Of course I could. Mudblood or not, she still functions on the levels of all women. Once you know her weakness, you can use it against her and she'd never even know."

"You know Hermione's weakness?"

"Seven years of violent arguments have taught me much… Leo, I'm going to help you. Your father would be furious if he ever found out, but he'd probably kill Granger first, which works out really well for me. There's just no way I will see a Malfoy rejected in this manner. It's an insult." Draco sighed thoughtfully, weighing his options. Perhaps with this distraction Hermione wouldn't always be in his way. 

"I'd never let anyone hurt her," Leo vowed.

"How very noble of you. Now shut up and listen to me. I'm going to get you one date with her… **one**… so screw her, fall in love, break her heart, let her break yours, and don't ever let me hear about any of it. Ever. Maybe you'll hurt her and I'll get to laugh, or maybe she'll hurt you and I'll get to say 'I told you so'. Either way I win."

"Draco, even if you did manage to get her to talk to you, she'd never consider-"

"Be in Hogsmeade by nine. You'll have what you want." Draco stated, only slightly disgusted with himself as he straightened up and stalked out of the room. He'd get his cousin a date with Hermione Granger, even if he had to tie her up and drag her there, kicking and screaming the entire way. 

Not an entirely unpleasant thought.

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Please Review? I hope I justified Draco's change of heart well enough. : )


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